Non-Participation

From Falsipedia

Non-Participation, sometimes referred to as Non-Par, is a form of civil disobedience originally attributed to the third century Roman philosopher, Lazinious the Slovenly. The concept behind non-participation is that if very few people take part in an activity, it will fail. Practitioners of Non-Par call themselves non-participants or non-pars and are recognizable in their absence from places where the protested activity is taking place.

Techniques Employed by Non-Participants

Non-participants generally try not to be in the same location as an event they are protesting or observing the results remotely. This is achieved through a number of techniques. Many times, the non-participant will be watching alternate television programming or attending a different film. Some non-participants will schedule a conflicting engagement, such as a meal or outing with a friend or loved one.

Once in a while, a non-participant can actually participate inappropriately in order to be a non-participant. Examples of this variety of non-participation often are seen as outbursts during moments of silence or people who walk on grass where a sign proclaims "Stay off the grass." This is technically known as perverted-participation, but is categorized by sociologists as part of the Non-Par movement.

Claimed Victories of the Non-Par Movement

• The demise of the XFL, Vince McMahon's Xtreme Football League was orchestrated by sports loving non-pars. Most non-participants worked on the viewership segment.
• The Hottie and the Nottie, a film starring Paris Hilton released in 2008 grossed just $27,966 and cost $9,000,000 to make. It is estimated that less than 3,500 people saw the movie in the United States, meaning the Non-Par movement comprised the other 99.9999% of the United States population.
• Kelly Clarkson's 2007 US Tour was canceled due to lack of ticket sales, another feather in the hat of the Non-Par movement.
• The leadership of Tamarac, Florida was stymied by non-pars who decided not to vote in a March 2008 annexation vote. None of the 68 registered voters voted, presumably in protest of the annexation or perhaps in protest of the vote.
• The Falsipedia.com and Novel Journey Non-Par Contest was destroyed by a single non-participant, who opted to make a comment thereby invalidating the multi-billion way tie that nearly existed.